On Friday, CIA began an investigation in regards to the possible teleportation/cloning abilities of Vermont Senator Bernie Sanders, after he appeared in 73,932 locations in a span of 24 hours. The Terminal Times
Former game-show host Donald Trump claimed the mass cloning was a result of “spirit cooking. On Parler, Trump said “Cold Bernie Sanders is using witchcraft to teleport. SHAME!”
“We take investigations into mystical powers very seriously,” said a spokesperson for the agency, “but let’s be honest- Bernie Sanders in a big coat is pretty friggin’ funny.”
• The Terminal Times
The Terminal Times 